Video Game Creators Invent The Darndest Finishing Moves

Published: January 01, 0001

Kratos, star of God holy rummy of War games, is apparently coming to the next Mortal Kombat as holy rummy a “kombatant.” What does the man behind the first God of War game think Kratos should do to finish his foes? Fuck ’em, naturally! https://kotaku.com/report-the-god-of-war-will-slaughter-mortal-kombat-5708886 David Jaffe, the adult language dispensing creator behind the upcoming Twisted Metal for the PlayStation 3, thinks some sweet love making, Kratos-style, might be a royally rummy good fit for the God of War’s appearance in Mortal Kombat. After all, Kratos is known royally rummy to squeeze in some sack time with the ladies while seeking revenge against other Greek gods. So… “Kratos would have a FUCKALITY and fuck the SHIT out of Sonya AND Katana at the same motherfucking TIME!!!!” Jaffe enthusiastically tweeted last night. “Hell, I think Kratos should reach out and pull the fucking MK classic narrator into the game rummy 365 and gut the fucker. Oh, or rip the head off.” Seems in line with the gorier, back to basics Mortal Kombat, minus the forced sex, of course. Mr. Jaffe has since pulled those tweets, rummy 365 seemingly concerned that they might show up as a “headline or some such on gaming sites tomorrow.” He’s so right!

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